Brian in China (5 months)

Brian left for China the Monday after Father’s Day. He had to go for work. I had been dreading that day. I really did not want him to go but understood that he had to. How was I going to do this? Austin’s care relied solely on me. I was not sure I was ready for this.

We got up Monday morning at 4am so we could get ready. I took Brian to the airport at 6am. Then I took Austin to daycare and I went to work. I wanted to be busy and not think about Brian traveling to China. I could not believe he was going to China. That is far away! Work kept me extremely busy. When I got off work, I felt extremely overwhelmed. I did not know how I was going to do everything but at least I was off work until Thursday.

Austin tried to go with Daddy!


Austin and I got home and we did our nightly routine. Austin had a meltdown around 7pm. Then I had a meltdown about 7:15pm. I wished that Austin could understand that it was just me and learn to be patient at least until Brian got back home. I put Austin in the stroller and we went for a walk. That walk really helped both of us. Once I got back home, I knew that I was going to be able to do this. It was going to be hard but I could do it.

I kept checking Continental.com on Brian’s flight. I missed him so much and he was only gone 12 hours. I slept on the couch that night waiting for him to call me via Skype. Brian finally called around 3am. I was so relieved. I felt better after talking to him. I was sad he did not get to see Austin because he was sleeping but at least I knew he was okay. Since we have our baby camera on the web, Brian was able to tune it occasionally at work because of the 12-hour time difference and see Austin sleeping.


On my days off, I have kept Austin with me. Part of me thought about taking him to daycare, but I wanted to enjoy my time with him. I still feel guilty about working so much recently. Austin being in daycare 10 hours a day was not fair to him. However we have changed that and I am much happier! Some of my days have been really long but spending time with Austin is worth it. My mom came up and spent two nights with us. She was with us all day Wednesday. It was nice because I got a nap in that day. Getting up with him every night (twice a night) is exhausting. I am so happy I am not working much right now because I don’t think I could do it.

Every night Austin gets a walk around the block. The nights my mom was here she went with us. It was nice not to walk alone. My neighbors have been walking with me on the other nights. Being home all the time by myself gets lonely, so it’s nice to have someone to walk with at night.

Brian seems to be enjoying his trip as much as he can be. He has been working a lot. Everything is going smoothly for him though. I talk to him at least once a day most days twice. That makes things so much easier. Everyday I watch the clock waiting for the time when Brian will call. That is the highlight of our days. I feel bad that Brian is away from Austin. I am sure he misses me but I know he really misses Austin. I have been sending him videos of Austin everyday.

Austin is getting so big. He weighs 18.5lb now. He is much more mobile. He is not crawling yet but he can roll all over the place. One day this week, Austin rolled half away through the living room. That is scary because that means I cannot leave him alone even for a minute now. That makes getting housework done difficult. I now lock him in the swing and bouncer seat every time he gets in it. Before I knew he would not move so it was not a big deal. Now he will roll right out of it!

Austin likes to grap and play with things. He can move his rattle from one hand to another. He still tries to put everything in his mouth. Even his big truck!
My mother in law and sister in law are on their way up to Ohio for the week. It will be nice to see them. I have not seen them in a few months. They are going to be shocked how big Austin is now. I keep saying he is my little toddler baby. He looks so grown up. He does not look like an infant. Melissa and I have a lot of plans this week. It’s going to be fun! Plus Brian gets home on Friday! I cannot wait!!